Scientist: Janitor? Uh, janitor?
[taps Thurgood, who gets frightened]
Thurgood: Ah! Oh..sorry ’bout that. What is it, scientist?
Scientist: I know this isn’t your responsibility but, uh, could you be a dear and run this down to the supply department for me? It’s on the second floor. [hands Thurgood a note]
Thurgood: Just run this down?
Scientist: Yes, but make sure you bring the order right back to me. I need it A.S.A.P.
Thurgood: Gotcha. Hey, I know this isn’t your responsibility but just wipe the rest of this shit up [hands him a mop] I’ll be right back.
Brian: You smoke?
Mary Jane: No my grandmother died from lung cancer.
Brian: That’s all the more reason to toke up man! It’ll ease the pain!
Brian: Lady, you want seven bucks for a used Kenny Loggins record? I’ll give you five.
Woman: Uh-uh. He autographed it himself…
Brian: Okay, I’ll give you four.
Brian: I’ll pretend I’m jamaican man! Yeah!
Thurgood: You have smoked yourself retarded!
Sir-Smokes-Alot: I’m impotent, man! Get away from me, bitch!
Nasty Nate: So the next time I come for you, I’m gonna want some cocktail…FRUIT!
Kenny: Ya hear that? I’m somebody’s bitch!
Brian: Get some…sour cream and onion chips, with some dip, man. Some beef jerkey, some peanut butter. Get some Hagen-Dagz ice-cream bars. A whole lotta of chocolate. Gotta have chocolate, man. Some popcorn, pink popcorn. GRAHAM CRACKERS!!! Graham crackers with the marshmallows. Little marshmallows with little chocolate bars and we’ll make some s’mores man. Celery, grape jelly, Captain Crunch with the little crunch berries, pizzas, we need two big pizzas, man, everything on ’em, water, a whole lotta water and…….Funyuns.